Monday, January 31, 2011

Weekly Update - Week 33

(end of week 32/beginning week 33)

On the Scale
Lost this week: ?

Starting Weight: 265.6
New Weight: 191.2
Total loss: 74.4

All righty then. I didn't post my weight loss because it seems that there may not be any. I ate the same way I always do and I worked out alot this week. I increased my strength training and I can feel the difference in sore muscles. I actually look and feel leaner even though the scale doesn't think so. My body fat measurement has gone down as well. These changes are all good ones and they make the non-loss tolerable I suppose (said with my best Pride and Prejudice accent). But I'm not giving up hope. I had to weigh in at 5:00 am because I had to take my mother in for surgery. Iusually weigh around 9:00 or 10:00. Last night before bed at about 11:00 I downed at least 48 oz. of water/Crystal Light. I don't know if the measly 6 hours in between is enough to process it all :) I'll weigh in and update my weight tomorrow. Either way I know what I did this week improved my body. I do still need to cut back on my calories but I have learned that feeling deprived is not going to help me in the long run so I'm not really sure what to do. More thoughts on that later.

In the Kitchen
Nothing new here. Didn't try anything new this week - oh, except for No-Pudge brownies for the kids ;) They are yummy - a nice treat once in a while.

At the Gym
I rocked the gym this week. M-Th we did 30 minutes of cardio and then alternated upper and lower body weights. It's been a while since I did lower body and I'm really glad to get back to it. I feel so strong and fit when my legs are a little bit sore. Saturday I did a full body workout. So Friday and Sunday are rest days. I'm thinking about trying to keep this routine every week. Normally hubby and I try to get to the gym 3 times a week but we don't plan specific days and routines and often I don't get all the strength training I'd like to. I think this plan will produce results.

In My Closet
I'm embracing size 14. I ordered a couple pairs of pants. Yesterday I wore a jacket that I have had in my closet for 10+ years. I bought it back then when I was working in a downtown office and had lost a bunch of weight. I have held on to this as a sort of goal item and now it fits. The strange thing is I thought I weight a good 30 lbs. less back then. I don't know if it's my memory that's failing or if it was just bigger on me. Not sure. But I am sure that it fits and I'm thrilled about that. 14 is not my goal by any means but it's a fun stop along the way.

Goals and Challenges
Workout plan is in place. I will have to make it work at home or go to the gym alone because my mother, who normally watches the boys while hubby and I go to the gym, is going to be recovering from surgery for a week or more. And there's been enough talk about revising my calorie intake - now I have to actually do it.

We're expecting another 1 -2 feet of snow this week. Yes, I said feet. Some snowshoeing is in order for sure!

Monday, January 24, 2011

Weekly Update - Week 32

(end of week 31/beginning week 32)

On the Scale
Lost this week: 2

Starting Weight: 265.6
New Weight: 191.2
Total loss: 74.4

Earlier this week by body and the scale teamed up and played a mean joke - on Tuesday I actually weighed more than a pound less than my Monday weigh-in. But I must have been dehydrated because it didn't last beyond that day. But none of that matters because I had a great weigh-in today and it's all down hill from here.

In the Kitchen
This week was the week of the awesome salad but I over did that one and now I'm tired of it. We had more pasta than usual in my house. Whole wheat of course but still, a bit much. I made a wonderful sauce and I had mine over eggplant while the boys had whole wheat penne. We also had lobster on Saturday - I am happy to report that my lemon, no butter policy has held firm since this summer. We've had lobster a few times and I truly do enjoy it just as much without the butter. I've also allowed my old friend Vitatop back into the house. I've temporarily banished Luna bars... ah the games we play. We took the kids to Coldstone and I had the a kid's size Sinless Cake Batter. I bought Rocco Dispirito's book Now Eat This and I am so excited to try a few recipes. I'm feeling refreshed in my desire to be creative in the kitchen and this book seems like the perfect addition to my toolbox.

At the Gym
I only made it to the gym once because of my knee "injury" and the laziness that followed. My workout on Thursday was awesome though. I ran a little, incline walked a little, used the Arc Trainer a little... it was good stuff. I bought some new workout music and that makes a huge difference for me. Despite my hatred for re-mixes I bought the Biggest Loser Sports Anthem mix. I love it for working out - honestly I think just listening to it makes me burn calories. We also bought Just Dance 2 for Wii. I used to love to dance but growing up and gaining weight changed that. This was a fun way to be active and add some variety to my exercse routine. I wore my Bodybugg out of curiosity - I burned 300 calories in 15 - 20 minutes! We have a solid gym schedule this week so things are looking good.

In My Closet
I fit into a size 14 jeans this week! They fit fine but I didn't think they looked so good but I wore them on Saturday. When Hubby saw me he said "now that's the size you should be wearing" so I feel pretty good about it. And my 16's really do look a bit silly. Yay for size 14!

Goals and Challenges
My goals are in sight - 185 soon and then on to 165 by the end of April which will be 100 lbs. lost. My #1 goal this week is to make working out a priority not an afterthought. My knee is better, my schedule is cooperating, I have what I need here so I don't even have to leave the house if it snows... I have no reason to not work my butt off this week. I am also struggling still with my calories - In my mind I know I would get better results if I dropped down to 1400 or 1200 but 1600 is just so easy for me. I don't even feel like I have to try very hard at that level - which is good and bad. I'm going to shoot for 1400 today and see how it goes.

Happy Monday everyone! If you live where I live stay warm and check on your eldery neighbors. If you live where it's not the arctic tundra go play outside!

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Salad Satisfaction

I thought I was getting sick of salad. But it turns out I was just getting sick of Bell Peppers and my regular salad dressing... I just had the best salad for lunch. 250 Calories at the very most.

Mixed Greens (whatever is the in overpriced fancy greens box I bought this week)

Thinly sliced Cucumber with the skin

Thinly sliced radish

Green Onions

Thinly Sliced Celery

Cherry Tomatoes - 70 for the whole salad

2 Grilled Portabello Mushrooms - 50

1 oz. Goat Cheese melted on the mushrooms - 76

2 TBSP Yogurt Blue Cheese Dressing - 50 calories

Now I know from experience that these are my favorite kind of lunches. Really big on flavor but when It's gone I'm satisfied because it had alot of bulk with the greens. Now that's a salad. I'll get some protein in my afternoon snack - Chobani w/ a tsp. of honey. I could totally be a vegetarian. Except for the pork tenderloin I'm cooking for dinner. That probably counts as meat ;)

Now please look away while I lick my plate....

How do you build a satisfying salad?

Monday, January 17, 2011

Weekly Update - Week 31

(end of week 30/beginning week 31)

On the Scale
Lost this week: 2

Starting Weight: 265.6
New Weight: 193.2
Total loss: 72.4

2 is my favorite number. When I lose 2 lbs in a week I feel like I got what I paid for in healthy eating and exercise. Yay!

In the Kitchen
This week I made a few new meals. Beef Tagine from Cooking Light - loved it. Salmon with caper sauce from Jillian Michaels site - so good. I did a good job measuring portions for the most part. I'm trying to bring down my daily calorie allowance but I am just so stinkin comfortable at 1600 ish calories that I find myself there almost every day. If I stay there I will need to burn more and that's difficult in the Winter. Oh well, I lost 2 lbs and ate healthy all week long. My extra calories this week did not include Luna bars for once. I did eat alot of fruit though. I feel good about this. Luna bars are great but they were becoming a high calorie habit. Last night I made roast beef with baked potatoes and gravy and all that... I ate a white potato! gasp! A little too much gravy but there wasn't much fat in it and it made the potato worth it. After 6 months with amost no white potatoes I find them really bland.

At the Gym
I tried the Arc Trainer this week and I really like it. I always thing people look a little funny when they do it and I could feel that I looked that same way but it was a great workout. We also set up our Body Shop and I love that too. I have to be careful I got "stuck" a couple of times where couldn't get out of the position I was in without letting go of the handles and sending myself crashing head first into the foot plate. It was amusing. And my hair got stuck a couple of times. Yeah, I didn't feel very graceful but I got a good workout. It's nice to have some alternatives.

In My Closet
I love that the coat I bought in October was tight then and is now roomy. I have a new love. Target has these great long sleeved "Tissue Tshirts" and they are my new favorite. I wear them under tshirts and sweaters, etc. They are so light and soft. The problem is that I sometimes forget how sheer they are - they don't work for modesty the way my regular layering tank tops do.

Goals and Challenges
I'm feeling pretty good. I hurt my knee today snowshoeing so I am sitting here hoping this doesn't prevent me from working out this week. I fell right on a rock and I really thought it was going to be a serious injury - so if it's just a bad bruise I'll take that. I feel like I'm settled in and focused on my next goal. I'm shooting for 100lbs lost by the end of April. My next mini goal is 185.6 (80 lbs). I'm thinking pedicure...

Happy Monday everyone!

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

A Metaphor

I had a really deep weird thought recently and I'm not sure if I wrote about it before. I'm too lazy to go check so if this is a repeat you'll have to forgive me.

Losing weight is like being pregnant. When you are expecting it's an ever-present state. No matter what you're doing it's always with you, your body and your mind. You rarely forget about it, even for a moment. At most moments in your day it is the most significant thing going on for you. You day dream about the end result constantly, you spend alot of time planning and preparing your meals and actvities to make sure you keep your baby healthy. You know things will be very different at the end, but it won't be over because you will have a baby, a child, a person to nurture for the rest of your life.

So significant weight loss is like that for me - always on my mind, always the undercurrent to whatever else may be happening. I spend alot of time, energy and emotion to support it. There is an end goal but I know it isn't really an "end", just a change. I know this metaphor doesn't hold up if you stretch it too much so I won't - but that ever present-ness has dwindled for me lately. That may be normal for this stage - it's been six months, but I am too close to where I want to be to slack off now.

I do know that I'm feeling more like my new self than I have since before Christmas. Yesterday and today little things like how much milk I put in my coffee seem important again and I'm glad. I need to keep my eye on the prize and I was getting a little nervous about the small habits and patterns that were showing thier ugly little heads. I've said this before - every bite matters. And every workout matters. They both matter as much, if not more, in my mind than they do on the scale. And what's in my head translates to the scale every time.

These are some of my "little foxes that spoil the vineyards"...

1. Not measuring and thinking that it doesn't matter

2. Thinking that I should eat a cinnamon roll because "it's not every day that I make fresh baked cinnamon rolls"

3. What's a couple hundred extra calories in the big picture

4. Being impatient when I'm hungry and eating the easiest thing instead of the best thing

5. Thinking I deserve to eat what I want even if it's more than I need

These little thoughts, if they take root will lead me back down the road that got me in trouble to begin with. I remember being a pretty, slightly curvy 13/14 year old - being told and telling myself that was cute that I could eat a double whopper with cheese and still be "skinny". First of all, a double whopper with cheese is never cute. Second, the mentality of doing unhealthy things and escaping the consequences is pure folly - where did I get that mindset? Ok this is going beyond my silly little pregnancy analogy so I better stop, but it's something for me to think about.

Monday, January 10, 2011

Weekly Update - Week 30

(end of week 29/beginning week 30)

On the Scale
Lost this week: 1.8

Starting Weight: 265.6
New Weight: 195.2
Total loss: 70.4

Unimpressed. The scale reflects my inability to bounce back completely from the holidays. For the weeks surrounding Christmas I decided to loosen up a bit on my calorie counting - not go crazy, but just allow myself a little more freedom. Its that freedom that I'm having trouble getting over. A bite here and there, an extra yogurt if I'm "hungry", five million clementines a day, that kind of thing. That together with not working out as much and you get 1.8 on the scale. Based planned calories in/calories out plan I consider 2 or more lbs a "good" week for me. I'm glad, in a way, that I didn't squeek by with 2 lbs. That would only encourage my recent behavior.
In the Kitchen
I have a few new tools. My husband bought me a panini grill. I'm really happy because the itty bitty Foreman grill I had before was a pain to clean and way to small to be useful. We also bought a new gas grill. We grill almost every night in the warm weather and a good bit in the cold too. But our old grill was just done. So there should be some wonderfully grilled lean meats in my future. I also bought a knife block recently to keep my better knives from getting ruined in the drawer.

This week my meal plan is incomplete. I got a subscription to Cooking Light magazine for Christmas. I'd like to try one or two new recipes a week.

Last night I made the most evil cinnamon rolls for the kids first day back to school today. My husband said they were the best thing I've ever made. I ate one last night and one this morning. I have no problem resisting things like that but when I worked hard to make them it's harder to pass up. Anyway, what's left is going to the freezer and book club.

At the Gym
I've all but abandoned C25K. I had gotten all the way up to the end of week 8. My last attempt at a 28 minute run didn't go well and then it got too difficult to keep up the schedule. It's all in my head but I keep coming up with reasons to not do it. I have however increased my walking incline and getting a great workout that way. So 30+ minutes between treadmill, elliptical and bike is what I'm doing for cardio. I'm I increased my weights recently and that has felt really good. This week my Ultimate Body Shop is going to be delivered. This is Jillian Michaels version of the Total Gym. My husband gets fitness reimbursement from work so we are using it to add to our home gym area. I can't wait to try this thing. I'll report back once I do.

In My Closet
Size 16 jeans are getting baggy. I bought a belt. I'd like to bypass 14 completely because at this rate I should be lower than that by the warm weather and I don't want to buy anything else for winter. I have a couple of things that are too big but for the most part I love my whole wardrobe right now. I will have to find a way to shrink some of my favorite new sweaters so I can wear them next year :)

Goals and Challenges
I need to find my focus and my drive - has anyone seen it? Part of the problem is that I look and feel pretty good. I'm at a lower weight than I've been for a very long time, I like my clothes, my fitness level is great. It's easy to forget why I'm doing this. I need to get my mind out of maintenence mode, I need to look in the mirror a little bit more, focus on some fitness goals, and get my tush to the gym more than 2x a week. I really want to get back to running. I loved it. I had high hopes of getting really good on the treadmill and then transitioning outside in the Spring.

The goal I'm working toward now is to lose a total of 100 lbs by my birthday at the end of April. It's within reach for sure. But only if I can regain the momentum and focus I had before.

Monday, January 3, 2011

Weekly Update - Week 29

(end of week 28/beginning week 29)

On the Scale
Lost this week: 0

Starting Weight: 265.6
New Weight: 197
Total loss: 68.6

Another no loss week - totally logical based on the fact that I wasn't carefully counting calories and I ate more than I normally do. I have a couple of small regrets but mostly I'm happy with the way I behaved this holiday season. I can clearly see how I'm different and at the same time I haven't changed all that much - it's a good reality check to see how easily I can go back to my old mindset. It's that way of thinking that I have to gaurd against as much as what I put in my mouth.

I didn't eat like I used to. I didn't eat like I have been. I ate in between - like a "normal" (i.e. not fat) person who is generally healthy but has a few "treats" now and then. That's the person I am becoming. But I am not there yet - I am still a person who has a good deal of weight to lose and I have to behave like that person - until I arrive. I will eventually arrive at a weight that moves me into the category of a fit and healthy person who has to work to maintain a huge weight loss.

I'll post my goals and New Year's Reflections later... for now, I'm cleaning my house and drinking my water and listening to my little boys play with Star Wars figures like there is no tomorrow. Life is good.