Monday, November 29, 2010

Weekly Update - Week 24

Weekly Update - Week 23
(end of week 23/beginning week 24)

On the Scale
Lost this week: 2.2
Total loss: 61

Phew! Good scale news today. I lost on Thanksgiving week. I also hit 60 lbs lost this week. I'm not sure what my ultimate goal weight is but I'm pretty sure I'm solidly half way there. I also should not have a problem hitting the goal I had set of getting under 200 lbs. by Christmas. Yeah, it's a good day.

In my Kitchen
I'm happy to reclaim my kitchen with all the healthy foods I normally keep on hand. Bye bye pie and other things I don't want to eat taking up my valuable shelf space. I haven't been very creative lately but I also haven't been bored with my staples.

At the Gym
Another good gym week. I started C25K this week - day 3 will be today. I'm feeling pretty excited about this and I think it definitly is going to kick up my weight loss. I can't wait to get to the gym tonight tonight.

Goals and Challenges
Now that the Christmas season is officially here I feel like I'm just going to buckle down and do what I need to do until the end of the year. Christmas food challenges exist but they are not too difficult - it's mostly about not bringing temptations into the house. My goals are to get under 200 by Christmas and continue with C25K.

I hope everyone is having a good Monday.

Monday, November 22, 2010

Thanksgiving Challenge

I'm participating in the Thankgiving Challenge over at Blog to Lose.

So much has changed since June 21 of this year. I am still a little surprised at my success. I've tried to lose weight many times - succeeded a little here and there. I even lost 60lbs once following an unhealthy, unsustainable diet. Of course I gained it back plus a lot more.

Every New Year, and every other milestone carried with it the "determination" to lose weight. My husband and made many, many promises of starting "Monday" or "after the ice cream is gone". With every other attempt I would have moments of victory and a few pounds lost but then over time the commitment would either dwindle or dissappear outright over some stumbling block. The excuses were like a calendar of obesity:

New Years day - can't start then, we have to finish the leftover Chinese food

Valentines day - we have to have some chocolate

Easter (gotta love mini eggs)

My Birthday


Beach Vacation

Summer, BBQs, etc.

Fall - comfort food, Anniversary Dinner, Fairs and fried dough




This year we tried our usual New Year's Resolution and lost it shortly thereafter. Somewhere between my Birthday in April and our camping trip in June a switch was flipped. There was a new Planet Fitness opening very close to our house. We joined online and picked up our membership packet on opening day - right before we went camping. We came home on Sunday and I think we went food shopping to stock up on healthy food. Monday we changed our diet and hit the gym. I had no reason to believe this time would be any different but here I am 58.8 lbs later and my commitment is just as strong, if not stronger.

What changed?

I now view my obesity and the habits that got me here as an enemy not an old friend. Watching shows like The Biggest Loser and Losing It with Jillian caused me to look at myself more realistically. This allows me to go into things like vacation and even Thankgiving planning to keep my healthy habits intact - not scheming to eat like an obese person and somehow get away with it on weigh in day. That is a huge change. Eating a pint of Ben and Jerry's doesn't seem all that different from doing something inapprpriate with a man who is not my husband. I'd be betraying myself If I let momentary pleasure turn my head from my healthy goals. That's why this has been "easy" this time around. Just like striving to be a loving, attentive, faithful spouse brings the reward of a happy marriage I'm reaping the rewards of my healthy choices:

■I am wearing a size 16 jeans instead of a 24 as I sit here with my laptop on my.... get this.... lap! I actually have a lap for my computer, my Bible or my children. It's amazing.

■I can run and play with my boys, not just watch them from the sidelines feeling exhausted from the effort of normal, every day activities.

■Doing laundry does not make me tired.

■Real food is delicious - I don't need things to be deep fried or drenched in cheese or unidentifiable sauces for them to be decadant and wonderful. I feel like I taste food the way it's supposed to be. I crave real food and I can tell it's for nourishment.

■It's fun to get dressed when I can actually look at my reflection and not see a fat stranger looking back.

■My husband and I enjoy working out together. It's a shared hobby that brings us together in a special way. We know we're doing something great for our family, for our intimacy, for our future and it's wonderful.

■I am no longer a walking testimony to my own gluttony and lack of self control. I still have a way to go but because I know how hard I'm working on it I don't feel ashamed. I find I am more confident and comfortable just being myself.

I think the biggest change is that I've just seen things as they really are. I came to grips with how unhealthy I was and I realized that I didn't want to be in that place for even one more day. I realized that I am the only one who got me here and I'm the only one who can change it. In the past I had the mindset that I knew there would be times I would "cheat" so I couldn't really commit deep down. I laid it out before the Lord and stopped holding on to the possibility of going back. I have made this process a priority and focus. I have the support of my family and that makes a huge difference. Every decision I make is not perfect but each is an individual chioce. I can approach Thanksgiving and Christmas knowing that I can fit special food "treats" in If I'm careful and want to be able to look myself and my family in the eye the next day and be proud of of how I handled it. I may have a little chocolate here and there or maybe 1 eggnog latte while I decorate the tree... but I will not trade my strong , healthy, shrinking body for a whole bag of Lindt truffles while wrapping Christmas gifts or a mountain of crab rangoon on New Year's Eve. Those things were killing me - now why would I want to do that?

Weekly Update - Week 23

(end of week 22/beginning week 23)

On the Scale
Lost this week: 3.4

Total loss: 58.8

I'm bouncing back today! My 3 week trend of losing <1 is over. I'm leaving plateauvill and I don't ever want to go back.

In my Kitchen
Nothing really noteworthy in the kitchen. I did make a wonderful veggie dish that will become a new regular feature. I'm enjoying cooking again. I have a new challenge of trying to add calories to my husband's food. He's at his goal and still working out really hard so he needs to add some healthy calories to his diet in order to not lose more weight. I'm doing things like adding olive oil to his pasta and giving him double servings of things. I've tightened up a little on what I'm eating - just weeded out the little habits that I thought may have been contributing to my not losing more. Because I had a good loss I think this helped.

In my Closet
I'm officially in a 16. I even bought a new pair from a different store to see if it was just the one brand that was fitting. I am so excited about this. I started this at a size 24! 16s look so tiny to me when I hold them up. I bought a little dress and some leggings and I just feel so happy about it.

At the Gym
Great week at the gym. We went 5 out of 7 days and I worked really hard while I was there. I think stepping it up also helped get me out of my rut. I tried to run a bit more this week. I feel pretty good jogging for 5 minutes at a time but each time I went back for a 2nd five minutes my legs just felt like lead. Is this normal?

Goals and Challenges
The big challenge on my mind is obviously Thanksgiving. We're having dinner at home and dessert at a friends house. It's all up to me. There are a few foods that I'd miss if I didn't have them but I haven't exactly decided what I'm going to eat. I don't have a big sweet tooth so dessert might not be worth it for me. The big question is this: am I going to count my calories and workout to make up for it, or am I just going to eat what I want within reason and not worry about it. Decisions, decisions. I'm going to do my Thanksgiving Challenge post later. That may help me decide.

Happy Thanksgiving week everyone!

Monday, November 15, 2010

Weekly Update - Week 22

(end of week 21/beginning week 22)

On the Scale
Lost this week: .8

Total loss: 55.4

The number says it all. Not even 1 pound. I know slow and steady wins the race. I'm still happy that it went down. To those who have already reminded me that I'm still losing at a healthy rate - I am listening to you, I really am. There is a big part of my brain that even thinks this is for the best, that my body will adjust to the weight loss better after this little slow down.

That being said, I'm still a little discouraged. The weight loss road has been pretty much smooth sailing until now. I keep telling my body that we're only about half way there so now is not the time to slow down. It doesn't listen. I have no choice but to keep doing what I've been doing and hope this passes soon. In lieu of my normal update categories I'm going to go through a few of the "little" changes that I'm hoping to blame for my new trend. Maybe I'll enlighten myself or something will jump out at someone reading this and I'll find a solution.

I've been drinking more. I used to be a total caffiene-aholic but with my weight loss efforts I had cut back to 2 - 8 oz. cups per day, and often the 2nd was decaf. I'm back up to 4 cups on many days, mostly not decaf. I don't use sugar and I track the calories in my 1% milk. It's possibly I think I'm using 1/4 a cup when it's really slightly more.

Night Time Snacking
Night time snacking has become a habit. Usually a Vitatop or baby carrots with Laughing Cow - so we're talking about 100 calories. But this has become something I'm doing even if I'm not really hungry - just a habit.

Eating Past Full
I've noticed a few times that I've eaten more than I needed at dinner. It was a nutritious, healthy dinner and I had the calories available but afterward I just felt "full". Not just satisfied, but really full.

Less Activity
Every few weeks we have a really full schedule and that often impacts my workouts. I haven't made it to the gym more than once or twice a week. This week I didn't even compensate with working out at home or walking outside. I have done more Weight Loss Yoga - but that is not cardio and that's what I'm really lacking.

Hormonal Stuff
I have REALLY irregular cycles. It's not unusual for me to go months without TOM. Yesterday I started spotting so something hormonal is obviously happening.

Because of my blood pressure and the fact that I am just ridiculously addicted to salt I had pretty much gone cold turkey... until recently. I have been givinn myself the freedom to salt certain foods a little bit - it's possible that I'm not paying attention and this has become more of a habit than I thought.

I've always struggled to drink enough water. I found that filling up two of those reusable plastic cups that look like Starbucks cold cups and then refilling them both a couple of times helped alot. The straw helped me drink more and faster. Well I left one of my cups at church a couple of weeks ago and that threw me off. I found it yesterday though... so that's good.

I think it's possible that I eat more using this tool. Before I had it I was more focused on balancing my diet - so many proteins, so many grains, etc. But counting calories and using the Bodybugg I have been more focused on my deficit and as a result eating more as long as it fits in to my calorie "budget". But I know I'm supposed to make sure I'm eating enough so I don't know how much impact this has. I just know that I've only had 2+ lb week since I started using it and prior to that most weeks were 2+.

I think that's it. This may seem like I'm over scrutinizing my habits but this is important for me. It's the little things that got me to where I was and I need to make sure I'm changing in the right ways. I'm all for learning the hard way but I don't want to waste time - I've wasted too much already. So I'm going to pay attention to these little things this week and see if it makes a difference. With Thanksgiving and Christmas and my Husband reaching his goal this is no time for me to lose my motivation.

Needless to say I have abandoned my goal to be under 200 by Christmas. I'm ok with that. That was really just a mind trick to keep my motivation up. Those games aren't working anymore. In the beginning it was all about Motivation and Momentum. I'm finding out that this middle part is all about Perseverance. Eventually it will be Maintenance. Each stage has it's own challenges, lessons, and rewards. Sometimes, especially on Monday mornings, I just don't know if I'm up to this :(

Saturday, November 13, 2010


I've been a little bit down lately because my weight loss has slowed down. At only just about the half-way point this is not motivating for me. I don't know if this is a normal plateau or if I need to change what I'm doing - or both. My husband is transitioning into maintenance mode and I'm afraid that somehow I'm subconsciously doing the same.... so much to think about.

I know that now is a good time to step it up in my eating and my workouts. The trouble is that with the cold weather, the holidays, and hubby reaching his goal, everything is working against stepping it up. Also, I'm highly motivated by success and not seeing it makes me want to just hide under the covers.

I'm considering putting the scale away until after Christmas and just putting all of my efforts into doing the best I can. Because at this point weighing myself doesn't actually do anything to help me in my efforts AND it's just depressing to see the number creep down so slowly (really isn't 2 lbs a week slow enough without slowing down more from there?). So what if I put the scale away, cut my calories a little bit more, and work out as much and as hard as I can? Then get on the scale on New Years Day and see what happens. Then, on Jan. 1 I can buckle down for the home stretch.

But what if it doesn't go well? What if I only lose a miniscule amount? I doesn't matter if I know I'm doing the best I can. And then I can learn to have other things as the first measure of my success and leave the fickle scale as just an additional tool. If Monday's weigh in doesn't go well I think this will be my next plan of action.

Monday, November 8, 2010

Weekly Update - Week 21

(end of week 20/beginning week 21)

On the Scale
Lost this week: 1

Total loss: 54.6

I'm biting the bullet and switching back to a Monday weigh-in. That means I'm a day short. I only lost 1 lb this week. After a small loss last week I expected more but it is what it is. I had a great week and I will continue to work hard and eat right this week - and I'll hope for a spectacular rebound week next week.

In my Kitchen
I had a good week - I made a few new things and a few old favorites and I think everyone was happy for the most part. This week I'm going to try to lighten up a few of our old standbys - Shepherd's Pie tonight. My backup grocery store now carries extra lean ground beef which makes me really happy. I'm going to do half with sweet potatoes I think. Hubby bought me a new healthy cookbook and I'm going to find a few new recipes to try this week.

In my Closet
I can't wear my size 20 jeans anymore - I just cant. I look like a clown. But last night I was able to zip up the 16s I bought a month or two ago to have on deck. They are not super comfortable but I know they will be fine after wearing for a couple of hours. I know not all 16s will fit - I even bought a couple of 18s at a thrift store that don't fit but this brand, this style is working. This is a huge NSV. I can't remember the last time I wore a 16.

Another sweet victory is my new pajama pants. Every year we buy the boys new PJs for Christmas Eve. Hubby usually gets some too. I usually don't because I just didn't care. Clothes were a necessary evil because I didn't feel cute so "why bother". Well this year when I ordered theirs I ordered a pair for me too. I just love them! I know it's not Christmas yet - but I'm not waiting. Althought I'm enjoying clothes right now I hope this will pass. This was never an important budget item for me but it's becoming one...

At the Gym
This was a good workout week though I only went to the gym once. Hubby set up a pretty decent workout area in the basement - I can get my cardio (bike and boxing), plus weights and a few other fun things - medicine ball, bosu, etc. Now when it's cold and rainy and our schedule is tight I can workout downstairs. I've gone back to doing weights for my lower body and I did Weight Loss yoga 3 or 4x (I can't remember). I feel strong and even though the scale hasn't moved as much as in the past I can tell things are changing.

Goals and Challenges
If I keep losing less than 2 lbs a week I won't make it to 199 by Christmas :( I would have to lose a solid 2 lbs a week and that includes Thanksgiving. I'm not revising my goal just yet but I may have to make it New Years - which is where I had that goal originally. I'm slightly tempted to just work my butt off and not weigh myself till then. As a daily weigher I don't think that will fly... pondering.

My Bodybugg is aggrivating me. It says I have a 1000 calorie deficit each day but the scale is not reflecting that - two weeks in a row. I am really good about measuring portions and tracking everything so something else has to be going on. Hopefully it's just muscle building and not that the stupid thing was a waste of money :)

Tonight is my book club - late night out but it's supposed to be picture night. We'll see if hubby is still awake when I get home. If so I may have some before and afters to share tomorrow.

It's wet and rainy here in New Hampshire - there was even a bit of sleet last night. I'm anxious to try my new snowshoes so "let it snow!"

I hope you all are having a happy Monday.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Weekly Update - Week 20

(end of week 19/beginning week 20)

On the Scale
Lost this week: 1.6 since

Total loss: 53.6

Not loving < 2 but it's not horrible. Too much sodium, not enough water, not enough exercise. My calorie deficit was still more than 1000 a day so I should have seen 2 lbs. but I know there are other factors. My weekly average will still take me to my goals and I know I'm doing what works and eating in a way that I can live with.

In my Kitchen
I'm trying hard to find some inspiration here. I like my meal plan for this week but lately the boys have not been super happy with my cooking and that makes me sad :( I think they're feeling the loss of some of their favorites. I need to figure out how to strike a balance here. I also want to be creative and have fun cooking. Summer was easier because of all the salads and grilling. Now my goals have changed to lighten up some of our family favorites and find some new recipes that take advantage of all the fall flavors and colors.

In my Closet
I have alot of tops to choose from but I'm in-between pant sizes. I look silly in my size 20 jeans :) I have a semi-formal event coming up on December 10th and I'm forcing myself to wait until it's closer to buy a dress so I don't get a size too big.

At the Gym
Last week our schedule got in the way alot. Too much. My commitment hasn't waivered though and that's a good feeling. I just have to adjust and find more ways to work out at home when I can't get to the gym.

Goals and Challenges
Daily my main goal is to drink my water and find a way to workout most days of the week. I'm bound and determined to get under 200 lbs by Christmas. There's no reason I shouldn't be able to reach this goal at my current pace. I've been thinking about Thanksgiving alot - I need to decide what's important and what we can live without this year.